LeakyCon! I'm finally here!

     Hello from Portland LeakyCon! Today has been an absolute blast. We rode the train and ate Harry Potter treats, enjoyed people watching and the fact that EVERYONE is nice to everyone.

     I've discovered Butter Beer and all its glory. I can't get enough of it, it is amazing and awesomely delicious. I bought a few posters and albums to be signed tomorrow. The real fun begins in the morning, as I will enter the convention center as AVPM Draco Malfoy and will stay in character until midnight or so. 

     I really was inspired by the overall message of the evening: be yourself, and we will accept you, and you will have more fun. Yes! I love that!

     I adore the movie Rent, and I adore Anthony Rapp even more so, and to hear him do what he does best gave me chills and feels. I am also very glad that I have watched so much Buffy, because I would have been totally lost with all the references being made.

     I had no idea that this gem existed. People are brought together by the love of something in common. I didn't know that artists write serious songs about fictitious characters that bring an entire audience to tears. It has been an emotional and beautiful day.

     I am already planning for next year, which will be held in Orlando (which just happens to be on my "do before 30" list with my husband). Today has reaffirmed my mantra "Do what you want, and be who you are" and that is a beautiful thing.

     More to come.

Here I am in my Draco Malfoy cosplay. I found Snape! We're showing off my AVPM inspired Dark Mark.

I want Hermione Granger and a rocketship...

     Hi everyone! With LeakyCon just 2 days away, I am getting very anxious, and all of my writing abilities seem to be flying out the door at rapid speed! I'm so sorry that it took me all day until now to be writing. I can't wait to show you all pictures of my Portland adventures this weekend.

     I am also super nervous about tomorrow's vlog, because it's going to be the longest one I've made so far. I don't know why, but I am still very camera shy.

     Good news! I am almost done with my corporate training program, which allows me to help businesses write a dress code and present it company wide, as well as working with individuals looking to be promoted within their company, looking to be hired, or want a more overall professional image. I was highly hesitant about this position, but I have been assured by just about everyone I know that I will be good at it. So many learning curves going on this year!

     I really can't believe I'm not done with Buffy yet. I have 14 episodes to go, and I need to be done by tomorrow night. I will let you know how that goes!

     My goal for the weekend is to meet Lauren Lopez from AVPM and get an autograph. If you have not seen A Very Potter Musical, I am begging you to stop what you are doing and watch it on youtube. I promise it's worth it just for Snape and Draco Malfoy. LeakyCon is making me a little crazier than usual.

     Okay, back to business. I forgot to share a word yesterday, so I am providing that one with today's word. 
1. Quacksalver/KWAK-sal-ver/ noun
     a) A charlatan
     b) A quack doctor

2. Megalomania/meg-uh-lo-MAY-nee-ah/ noun
     a) A mania for grandiose or extravagant things or actions.
     b) A mental disorder characterized by delusions of    
     grandeur. 
I have been known to exhibit the latter...

     Well, I suppose things will get back on track next week. I will attempt to share pictures throughout my weekend via facebook (facebook.com/heidimyworld) and keep my scheduled time for Thursday. I'll blog from the train!

https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&docid=PAXamo-7saPZhM&tbnid=6PZINXHZWhKKCM:&ved=0CAUQjRw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.tumblr.com%2Ftagged%2Fa%2520very%2520potter%2520musical%2520gif&ei=3nvKUfWFFYf-iQKju4GIDA&bvm=bv.48340889,d.cGE&psig=AFQjCNHv2SkXSe3_95oOlHwZAUA6T039vw&ust=1372310866603133

Uninspired - I apologize for the random nature of this post.

     Hi everyone! Sorry this is such a late post. I was contemplating not writing anything today. It rained all day, and it was so easy to find other things to do. I even read other blogs and watched beauty tutorials on youtube to try and find some inspiration. 

     That was a long way of saying, whatever I write about in the next few paragraphs is just as much a surprise for me too!

     Let's just talk about what is going on in my life... Because that's not boring! I am attending LeakyCon in Portland next week, and have pieced together some great outfits/costumes. For those of you who have seen A Very Potter Musical, I will be dressed as Draco Malfoy and intend to embody that persona. I am also a very big fan of The Lizzie Bennett Diaries, so will be wearing Mr. Darcy inspired shirts. Yay for being a geek!

     Hmm... Well, making youtube videos is a lot more fun than I thought it would be. I'm shooting on average 4 a week, but only posting 1. I need to make a separate channel for me and my bestie Rachel, who you might know from our singing duets on my channel. She's a gem.

     Things making me very happy lately are chocolate (of course!), Daily Grace, Mamrie Hart, and Miranda Sings (all on youtube), and just recently discovered Flula on youtube as well. Just a lot of youtube watching going on in my life right now.

     I am still very much in the middle of my challenge to watch 7 seasons of Buffy and 5 seasons of Angel. I am 6 1/2 down for B and 3 1/2 down for A. I need to have a whole season and a half watched by this time next week because of LeakyCon! It really crept up on me.

     I love singing Disney songs.

     I can't remember if you know this, but I have 4 cats. If my husband hadn't married me when he did, I would have at least 10 by now. That is not a joke. 

     If you have not watched the BBC Sherlock with Benedict Cumberbatch, I think you might need a doctor. On that note, the other day I was having a very real "discussion" with my husband's straight male co-worker about how I think Benedict was sent here from Heaven. He did not believe this and proceeded to pull up pictures (via the web) of other British actors who he thought to be Heaven sent. This made me very angry.

     Well, my husband is telling me it is time to go see Man of Steel. I suppose he is right.

     I will leave you with my word of the day for the 30 day word challenge that I am getting very bored with. "Capricious" is an adjective that means "Given to sudden behavior change" which I have been known to do, so it fits.

     Here's to hoping I find some inspiration over the weekend! I hope I can keep my readers...

This was my attempt to get a picture of all 4, but Steve jumped right as I took the shot.

Room to Grow

     Hi all! I hope everyone had a fantastic weekend. I am still watching a lot of Buffy and Angel in my spare time. 

     I've been getting a lot of questions for specifics on how I came to love my body. First of all, I want to be completely honest and say I am not there yet. I have come leaps and bounds from how I viewed myself as a teen, and even from a year ago.

     It is a challenge that I feel will never miraculously disappear. I say affirmations, I read, I educate myself on what is healthy. Do I eat perfect everyday? No! I exercise on a regular basis until I don't. I eat well until I don't. 

     One of the things that has helped me get to a healthy mindset is to every morning, when I look in the mirror, I choose to notice 5 things that I like/love about myself. You can choose to do this out loud, or inside your head. I also have mentioned putting a list on the mirror of things I have accomplished, character traits, as well as physical things that I appreciate about myself. I was not making that up, people! I add 1 or 2 things to that list a week. 

     I also am a lot more assertive. If someone calls someone else fat, or even points anything in particular out about someone else in a negative way, I call them on it. Everyone has insecurities, and none of us know everyone's stories and struggles. Work on seeing people, not flaws.

     Again, I am so not perfect at this. I still point out little things that probably no one else even notices, but I have gotten really good at pointing out something wonderful about myself every time I catch myself dwelling on what I perceive to be a flaw.

     I would love to continue hearing from all of you. Please "Like" me on facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HeidiMyWorld?ref=hl Follow me on twitter: @heidimyworld, comment and share.

     Also, I am on day 6 of my 30 Day Word Challenge. Who's doing it too? My word of the day is: "Falcate" which is an adjective that means curved like a scythe or sickle; hooked; falciform. 

Vocabulary - Mine is weaker than I thought...

     Hello again! I hope all of you are well. I want to take time to say thank you to all those who sent me private messages and left comments. Thank you for sharing. I appreciate your vulnerability and am inspired by some of the stories you sent. I would like to encourage any of my readers to visit this website, because it is awesome and has real statistics and I found it to be very informative: www.bodypositive.com

     So I wasn't really sure of what to write today (so what else is new?) and ended up reading more about my job description as an Image Consultant as well as reading a few similar blogs to my own on Tumblr (thanks to Jennifer C.) and now have a few ideas.

     Not only am I to help people with how to apply makeup and find out what colors look best on them, but I also teach etiquette. Dining, interview, meeting with a client and the like. The one that surprised me the most is speech. Improving vocabulary, conversation skills, non-verbal communication as well as conversation etiquette. Me? Teach that? Some of you who know me might even be sniggering at this. I am a very outspoken and blunt person most of the time. This means that I have to learn to do all of the things I will be teaching my clients.

     If you haven't discovered this little gem, I encourage you to go to www.vocaboly.com/vocabulary-test and take all the different vocabulary tests on the page. In the beginning, I patted myself on the back, because I did quite well on the first several, but then I was surprised at how much I didn't actually know.

     I am going to take a personal challenge, and you are welcome to join me. I am going to look at a thesaurus every day for the next 30 days, find words that I am not familiar with and practice using them in my every day speech. I will share a word a day on my Facebook page,(www.facebook.com/heidimyworld) as well as my twitter (@heidimyworld) and I will also be using one word in each of my blogs and vlog. Yay me! And us!

     I will even get us started by using one right now! My word of the day is: Xanthic - pronunciation = Zan-thik, adjective 1. of or pertaining to a yellow or yellowish color 2. Chemistry- of or derived from xanthine or xanthic acid. Origin - xanthic entered the English language in the 1800s from the Greek term, xanthos meaning "yellow". What a xanthic bellied coward! Ha! I learned something!

     Go forth, learn and share, my friends!
 

Too Short For My Weight

     Hello all! I hope everyone is doing well. I had a wonderful weekend. A friend invited me to a tea party with a guest speaker on the topic of Body Image.

     I felt great about hearing some of the same things I've been blogging about, but also found some good resources for more topics for future blogs.

     Eating disorders were a big part of the discussion, and it got me thinking. I don't tell many people this, because I tend to stay positive and not share challenges, but this is so far behind me I think it could maybe help someone; I had eating disorders for almost 2 years as a teen.

     I struggled with Anorexia at 13, lost a  lot of weight (some of that was from getting Mono) and even more self esteem. I didn't like myself. I was a late bloomer and was told on a regular basis by boys my age that I had a body just like them.

     I started sleeping as late as I could get away with, skipping breakfast and just disappearing at lunch time. I would often lie about having already eaten lunch. At dinner time, I would take tiny portions, push food around my plate and put things in my napkin. I would go to a friends house before dinner and tell both families I ate at either place. I was depressed.

     I met someone in a play I was in who quickly figured out what I was doing. We had become swing dance partners within months of meeting. "Heidi, you can't do all of this hardcore training with me when you have no energy. You really need to eat more" He said on several occasions.

     I started to really like this boy and found myself agreeing with everything he said. He told me that if I didn't start eating  he would have to find a more healthy partner. I freaked out and began eating around him, but not at home.

     Re-starting an eating habit was very hard. I had to force myself to eat, and sometimes that caused me to vomit. This became normal. Then I felt like I was getting some food, it just wasn't staying in my system long enough to make me fat.

     This lasted several months, and then my partner noticed. Again with the threats of finding someone else to dance with. I loved dancing. We had competed several times together at this point, and I had felt like I finally found something that would keep me happy.

     Out of all of this, I am so grateful to my friend for seeing how beautiful I was regardless of my figure. I am even more grateful that he didn't tell my parents. They would not have understood. He started saying, "I'm so hungry, do you want to get something to eat?" every time I saw him. This made me love food again, because he did. 

     Within a few months of ending my battle with Anorexia and Bulimia, I had a growth spurt.  I grew 4 inches taller in one summer, my hips spread, and I felt like a girl finally. 

     No one had ever told me that you grow out before you grow up. I was a new person. I always had insecurities in the back of my head, but somehow it was easier to cope with. It was okay to love food. It was okay to not look like a model.

     I know that my short lived food-free battle is nothing in comparison to those who have struggled their whole life. I am grateful that I was able to overcome without the help of therapy. However, I highly recommend therapy for those dealing with eating disorders.

     I still struggle every day to love my body. Like most women, I bought into the lie of what the ideal woman is. Surrounding myself with positive people, the books I read, and knowing that I am created in God's image means the woman staring back at me in the mirror is always smiling.

     

This is a picture of me a few months after my growth spurt.

Goals

     Hey everybody! It's been a fairly productive week so far and I'm looking forward to a fantastic weekend. 

     I started a vlog series on body types and how to dress for them. For the next 4 weeks I will go over two body types a week and then finally physically show you in the last video how best to dress and accessorize for each one. I hope it helps!

     I want to stop and thank you all for continuing to read and support me. I've been getting sessions and hope that they continue. 

     I've been getting vacation brain lately and things keep slipping through the cracks. Please continue to send me questions/suggestions through email, twitter and Facebook. 

     I'm going to Alaska this August to celebrate my 5th wedding anniversary. I'm really excited to see some family and friends while having a romantic time as well. I'll keep my blog schedule and maybe even post more often while I'm there, so you can see pictures. 

     I recently put together a list of things I want to do/accomplish before I'm 30 (I'm 27), and I thought it would be fun to challenge all of you to make lists too. If there is an upcoming milestone, or even if there's something you would like to accomplish in the next year, write it down. 

     80% of goals reached are the ones that were written down. I re-adjust my list every year. I'll give you a few examples:
1. Go on a mission trip to a third world country.
2. Go bungee jumping
3. Travel to Scotland and Ireland
Be as specific as you can with your goals, so it can be crystal clear how and when you can achieve those things.

     I'll even keep you posted as to when I can check some off of my list. Share your list! Don't be afraid to tell people about it. Saying it out loud puts a slight amount of pressure, because now it's real. Now you have to get it done! It can be nerve wracking as well as exciting. 

     I know this was short, but I really wasn't sure of what I was going to write about today. That's also why it's so late! Hope to hear from you all soon.

Here's a picture of me with my husband Paul the last time we were in Alaska.

7 Seasons of Buffy

     Hello again! I hope you all had wonderful weekends. The weather has been amazing here, which has distracted me from my to-do list.

     I wasn't sure of what to write about today, but then I figured I'd just write about how I have been spending my time for the last week and a half.

     I promised a friend that I would give her beloved show a chance that I had never given it before. I told her I would watch 7 seasons of the popular Joss Whedon show, Buffy the Vampire Slayer and 5 seasons of Angel. I did this because I will be attending Leaky Con with this friend, and Tom Lenk will be there. Know who he is? I didn't! I still don't actually.

     Anyway, I have watched almost 4 seasons in 9 days. That is a lot of screen time! These are the things I have learned so far: 
1. The 90's offered nothing in terms of fashion.
2. People evolve and change over time and through different circumstances.
3. Good usually prevails.
4. The guy doesn't always get the girl.
5. Don't kids have parents?

     So why am I telling all of you this? There's a point, I promise. Typically when someone suggests a show that I have seen maybe a few clips or a few random episodes of, I nod my head, occasionally roll my eyes and release my opinion. 

     This time was different. My friend gave me this insight: "When I've connected to something on such a deep level and love it so much, that I'm willing to tell someone about it, then they turn that thing down, it's almost like them saying they don't like a piece of me and they're not willing to give it a fair chance". I paraphrased, but you get the idea.

     I had to mull that over a little bit. How many times have you (I know you can relate) watched a movie, listened to a piece of music, read a book or seen anything that was moving or touched you emotionally, and out of excitement you told someone about it, and they responded negatively? I'm guessing you're like me, and it's too many times to count.

     I know what you're thinking, "Take your own advice Heidi!" Yeah, believe me, I've thought about that. I love to tell people to let their freak flag fly without worry of being judged, and here I am being on the judgy side. Yikes! 

     I ate a huge piece of humble pie, and although this show maybe doesn't connect to me personally, I know a lot of people who love it, and feel that I would better understand them as people if I were to watch it. So! I have a lot more watching to do! And I know that my friend will watch all of the Will Ferrell movies with me now. ;)